Other Forum, Jokes Sub-Category, Nasty Thread
What have [feel free to ad lib name] Kirstie Allie's boyfriend and margarine got in common?
They both come in a tub.
They both come in a tub.
My wife told me that if I cheated on her that she'd kill herself.
Like the temptation wasn't bad enough in the first place.
Like the temptation wasn't bad enough in the first place.
A man gets pulled over for speeding. The policeman's at the end of his shift and says to the driver “if you can come up with an original excuse for your speeding that I haven't heard, you're free to go.”
“Well,” the man starts, “last week my wife ran off with a policeman. When I saw you in my mirrors I was afraid that you were chasing me to give her back.”
“Have a nice day, sir” came the reply.
“Well,” the man starts, “last week my wife ran off with a policeman. When I saw you in my mirrors I was afraid that you were chasing me to give her back.”
“Have a nice day, sir” came the reply.
A man runs into a bank waving a gun in the air. He shouts at everyone to hit the deck, then approaches the teller. He's just about to tell her to “put all the money in the bag” when his mask slips.
Concerned, he shouts at the teller “did you see my face?”
“Yes” she replied and the bank robber shot her in the face killing her instantly.
Next, he looks round and sees a man on the floor peeking through his fingers. “Oy you! Did you see my face” he shouted at the man.
“No” he replied. “But I'm pretty sure my mother-in-law lying over there just did”
Concerned, he shouts at the teller “did you see my face?”
“Yes” she replied and the bank robber shot her in the face killing her instantly.
Next, he looks round and sees a man on the floor peeking through his fingers. “Oy you! Did you see my face” he shouted at the man.
“No” he replied. “But I'm pretty sure my mother-in-law lying over there just did”
16th January 2008